(Copyright 2004)

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A very classy and smartly dressed society woman,

Looking just a bit too smug,

Entered an expensive Persian carpet store,

While looking for a rug.


She spotted then the perfect one before her,

Resting there upon the floor,

And bent over to inspect it carefully,

Not knowing what was next in store.


While bending over to inspect it,

She accidentally broke wind,

And being quite embarrassed,

She stood up quickly, looking 'round,

And feeling quite chagrined.


Standing there behind her was a salesman,

Who looked her in the eye,

She thought right then that she would die,

And wished she'd turn to ice,

But instead she swiftly turned to him,

Thinking to be nice,

And asked of him the price.


She said it was the perfect fit,

The salesman looked at her and said:

"Lady, if you only farted when you touched it,

When you hear the price you'll shit."


© Michael B. Abramson (aka Poetic Always)